CHARLESTON, W.Va. –
Before the COVID pandemic, Susan Izzo, lead Child and Youth Programs coordinator for the West Virginia National Guard, enjoyed going into communities and hosting outreach activities for military families.
One thing she liked to do was the blanket activity. Participants would hold up a blanket while balls were tossed onto it. The goal was to keep those balls moving, as they represented everyday responsibilities: Taking care of kids, cleaning the house, paying bills, coaching a soccer team. One by one, Izzo would ask someone to let go of the blanket and step away, leaving those left to keep the balls moving. The participants who let go represented a service member who deployed, making it harder to keep all the moving parts of everyday life moving.
Deployments and reintegration of a service member is a difficult time for all WVNG families. The Family Readiness Center and Family Programs staff across the state wants families to know that they have a support system, especially when it comes time for their deployed loved one to return home.
Izzo explained that our National Guard families are unique.
“Guard families are different from full-time military families because they are geographically dispersed. They are our football coaches, doctors and lawyers,” she said. “Our #OneGuard families are throughout our communities. A deployment is like a ripple effect throughout the entire community.”
Before the pandemic, Soldier and Family Readiness Specialists would have in-person meetings with Family Readiness Groups. Children would make posters while parents received information on reunification. Now, Zoom calls have replaced in-person meetings. However, Izzo said these Zoom calls have allowed for more interaction between service providers and families.
Michael Webb, the West Virginia Military OneSource Consultant, joining with regional Soldier and Family Readiness Specialists Heather Neal, based in Glen Jean, and Kelli Higginbotham, based in Summersville, recently talked with families of the 111th Engineering Brigade via Zoom to provide resources for their upcoming reunification and reintegration process.
“We try to make it as informal as possible, and we will stay on the call until everyone has left to make sure we can answer everyone’s questions in a way that is comfortable for the family member,” Izzo said.
As the specialists explained what families and loved ones could expect, they stressed that every family and reunification is different, as is every deployment. Everyone on the call, including Izzo, Neal and Higginbotham, gave personal stories of their own experiences with their spouses returning from deployment. The key to the successful reunification of families is ultimately to be patient and find ways to communicate.
“Try to talk through your feelings, be honest, and manage expectations,” Higginbotham said.
Chaplain Justin Elliott echoed the same sentiments as Neal and Higginbotham.
“The biggest challenge with the reunification process is that the family members that are left behind and soldiers that move on are no longer the same people they were when they left,” Elliott said. “The dynamics of the family change. Spouses have to step up and children have to change how they do things or find a new routine. The first month after reunification is especially hard as the service member finds their place back in the family and everyone is readjusting. It takes a lot of patience and can lead to frustration, but communication goes a long way.”
“Everyone readjusts at their own pace. Knowing your resources and knowing your support systems are vital. We are here for you and want to help,” Izzo added.
In addition to helping spouses and partners understand different phases of reunification, Izzo provides resources specifically for children. She has had to find creative ways to support WVNG children through the pandemic.
“We’ve developed mailers that include deployment journals,” she said. “For the unit that is currently deployed, we sent around 150 deployment journals out.”
Each mail packet includes activities for families to complete with their children and age-appropriate materials to help support children through their parent’s deployment. They have become so popular that Izzo and her team plan to continue to send mailers out every quarter, even after COVID restrictions ease.
Families of the deployed are encouraged to contact their nearest Soldier and Family Readiness Specialist to get the best care and support. Other resources available to our #OneGuard family include TRICARE, transition assistance, personal finance counselors, chaplain services and military and family life counselors. Call 866-986-4326 to be connected with these resources and to find the nearest Soldier and Family Readiness Specialist. Updated information on contacts and resources can be found on the West Virginia National Guard Family Programs Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/wvngfamilyprograms.