CHARLESTON, W.Va. –
Serving in the military can place undue stress on couples and their families. But the Army’s Strong Bonds program is designed to help strengthen these relationships and create a more resilient and ready force in the process.
Members of the WVNG Chaplain Corps host four Strong Bonds events across the state each year. Maj. Justin Elliott, based in Fairmont, has served as the state’s Strong Bonds program manager for the past five years and is one of two full-time Chaplains assisting members of the One Guard family. Six other chaplains work on a part-time basis throughout the state.
“Chaplains are clergy people serving in a military capacity,” Elliott said. “Anything your local pastor or minister does, we can do, such as marriages, baptisms and funerals. We also provide counseling, spiritual or nonspiritual, depending on the Soldier.”
Four Strong Bonds events are held each year, two in the northern part of the state and two in the southern region. Elliott explained the Chaplain Corps typically hosts these events at resorts and in places that offer family-friendly activities. Two events each year are focused on couples and help them work on relationship building, growing closer as a couple, and strengthening their marriage. Two annual family events focus on similar issues, but also teach families how to deal with stressors and strengthen unique family relationships.
Strong Bonds events are typically three days long. For family events, children attend age-appropriate instructional classes.
“We typically have a meet-and-greet reception on Friday evenings,” Elliott said. “Saturdays usually consist of instruction periods in the morning and afternoon, and the rest of the day is free for couples or families to spend time together. Sunday includes an optional chapel service and a short instructional session before we end our formal time together.”
The instructional portion of the events allows families or couples to meet and interact with one another and build those relationships as well.
“There might be a couple who is expecting their first child or other couples who have multiple children and they can share their stories and experiences,” Elliot said.
Strong Bonds is a year-round program designed to improve resiliency and different types of relationships. Elliott explained that there is a stigma when Soldiers attend Strong Bonds events because it means their marriage or family is having issues, but that is not the case, he said.
“I look at it this way: You wouldn’t work out the day before your PT test. It’s a continual process to stay in shape,” he said. “If you don’t invest in your relationships continually, issues can snowball, and relationships suffer.”
Creating and maintaining strong and resilient relationships benefits everyone, including the Soldier’s unit. Balancing military duties with civilian work and family life can be tough.
“I see Strong Bonds events as vital to strengthening our families and relationships,” Elliott said. “Guardsmen have the added difficulty of balancing a civilian job with their military responsibilities, on top of being a spouse or parent.”
As in any other organization, Elliott said divorce and marital problems are an issue within the WVNG. Strong Bonds programs are tailored to address these needs, specifically teaching couples how they can improve communication.
“I think the biggest issue we face in our marriages and families is communication,” he said. “Either we are not communicating, or we are communicating in the wrong way. Focusing on communication as a couple is the most valuable thing we can do. My advice is to be respectful, actively listen and take turns listening to come to a resolution together.”
The next married couple's Strong Bonds event is December 3-5 at the Morgantown Marriott at Waterfront Place. Meals, lodging and childcare will be provided. Visit strongbonds.army.mil to register by November 18. Direct questions about Strong Bonds events to Maj. Elliott by calling 304-552-6002 or emailing justin.m.elliott2.mil@army.mil.
Chaplain Michael Allen serves the southern part of the state and can be reached by calling 304-400-9290 or emailing michael.l.allen15.mil@army.mil.