CHARLESTON, W.Va. –
Samantha Gomolka is an achiever. Army wife. Mother of three. Physician Assistant. Volunteer at a local children’s hospital emergency room, at her local church, and at her sons’ school. She’s the co-founder of the non-profit organization Project 33 Memorial Foundation honoring special forces soldiers killed since 9/11. And now, she has been selected to represent the National Guard as the Armed Forces Insurance Military Spouse of the Year (AFI MSOY) for 2019.
Samantha met her husband Michael in eighth grade. “We developed a friendship in high school and worked at the same restaurant,” she recalled. “I had a crush on him! I would keep him company at the end of our shifts while he finished up. He would make me chicken parmesan sandwiches and I would watch him wash pots and pans.”
By their senior year, the two had developed feelings for each other deeper than friendship, but they kept it hidden from everyone else. “Our senior year we would go on, ‘secret dates’, because he had a girlfriend and I had a boyfriend,” Gomolka said. “I would never kiss him though, and I believe to this day that is what kept him coming back!
Before they began their separate paths after high school graduation in 1998, Samantha and Michael went on one ‘official’ date in 1999, and both expressed how they felt to the other. “He told me he loved me, and I truly felt the same way.”
It would be five years before they spoke again. Samantha was off to college, and Michael off to the U.S. Army where he eventually earned his way into the special forces.
But Samantha never forgot Michael, and by 2004, the draw to him was overpowering. “I was dating a boy but couldn’t get Michael out of my head. I was determined to track him down,” said Gomolka. On July 23rd of that year, she finally reached him by phone at 11 p.m. Six hours later, their connection firmly reestablished, they both hung up. As fate would have it, Michael was moving back to their hometown and when he arrived, they began dating, and five months later they were married.
And so began the journey of being the wife of a special forces Soldier in a time of incredible ops-tempo.
Like any military spouse, Gomolka has had her share of challenges. “It is a difficult situation at times. It can be difficult to be a working mother with kids and a deployed husband. Every time he leaves, I promise you, something around the house breaks! But having a solid network of family, friends, and other military spouses to carry me through has made such a great difference in our deployment experiences.”
While being a military spouse can be challenging, according to Gomolka, it has its benefits too.
“Being a military spouse, I have learned resilience, independence, and a strength that I didn’t know I had as a 24-year old girl when we were first married,” she stated. “The best aspect of being in a military family is that we know the importance of stolen moments and to really be present and enjoy our time together. Crazy things like flying across the country just to spend 36 hours together before a deployment, or him driving three states away to meet me for a wedding so I didn’t have to dance alone are the sacrifices that make all the difference. I am proud of our commitment to each other, and our dedication to move mountains for our marriage.”
Asked if she has any advice for other spouses on how to handle Army spouse life, Gomolka chuckled. “The tempo of deployments has been intense the past few years, so I made my motto, ‘Thrive not survive!’ Any military spouse can relate that when your significant other is gone, things get busy! But it is important to take the time to spend with friends or escape to the spa for an hour, to purposefully create joy and eliminate stressors. That allows you to reset and conquer your daily responsibilities. It’s a marathon, not a sprint!”
Throwing herself into the role of military spouse, Gomolka has been active during her 14-year marriage in the Family Readiness Group (FRG) and has participated in the Army Family Team Building (AFTB) program. She takes pride in her role as “team mom” to her fellow spouses. “When there is a core strength and cohesiveness felt within the team and families, the mission ahead is only that much stronger and set up for success,” she said.
In 2018, the Gomolka’s co-founded a non-profit foundation whose mission is to create awareness of special operation soldiers killed since 9/11. Each year, the foundation selects one Soldier to honor by telling their life story and sharing their sacrifice. They also hold events such as charity runs, with all proceeds going to organizations to help veterans around the nation.
“Through our non-profit, I have had the pleasure of meeting so many people in the local community that love our cause, and that want to meet, support, and be engaged in our military lifestyle. The heart of America is so amazing! And the work we have been able to accomplish through the foundation is a blessing,” Samantha stated.
Selected as the West Virginia National Guard Spouse of the Year, Gomolka was then named Spouse of the Year for the entire National Guard and will now compete against the other branches of the armed forces to become the National Spouse of the Year. Regardless of the eventual outcome of the national contest, Gomolka is honored to serve as West Virginias representative, and as always has goals to achieve.
“I want to promote education of the various wonderful programs that are offered to military families such as Child Care Aware of America or Our Military Kids,” she stated. “It makes me sad to hear of other families struggling, or just not knowing how many programs and opportunities there are to assist. So I want to help spread the word and help make our military families more resilient and strong.”
The AFI MSOY award was founded in 2008 to honor military spouses of all ranks and from all branches of service. More than a million military spouses support and maintain the home front while service members deploy to defend the nation. The award recognizes military spouse’s important contributions and unwavering commitment to the military community and the country.
The AFI MSOY branch winners were announced March 1, 2019. The national vote competition will be May 7-8, and the final National Spouse of the Year awards ceremony will be held on May 9, 2019.